Only two episodes into Season 4 of The Chosen and already the writers continue to take the necessary care and time to deal with grief honestly: slowly, vulnerably, and messily.

Go read Part 1 of this series to catch up.

The Chosen’s stellar “writing room” team, led by Creator/Director Dallas Jenkins, includes friends Tyler Thompson and Ryan Swanson. Whether these guys have experienced personal grief or not, it’s clear they understand the depth, uncertainty, nuance, and overall messiness of grief. As much as we would like, even as Christians, the process of grief does not come in a pretty package with a bow. Or, that it should come in a uniform way that looks and feels the same for everyone.

After sharing a laugh over the staleness of bread, Jesus, played by Jonathan Roumie, succinctly encourages Andrew, played by Noah James, when his head hangs in shame for laughing at such a solemn time:

Andrew: I feel so guilty. I should be in shambles.

Jesus: No. No, Andrew. There is no ‘should’ in grief. There’s no right way to mourn. You’ve already experienced much grief when John was arrested. Falling to pieces again would not honor John’s memory anymore than feeling nothing at all.

Andrew: Mm.

And there it is.

Of course, we don’t know what Jesus would have said to Andrew after the death of his friend and Jesus’ cousin, John the Baptist. But, in alignment with Jesus’ character and values of setting his followers free from guilt and shame and this propensity to follow every “should” of the law just right, it’s easy to imagine Jesus saying exactly this. Jesus would set his followers free even in the way they feel their emotions and heal through their grief.

Free to be human. Free to feel all the feels. Free to be emotional. Free to be fully alive to the pain and hurt we experience. Free to feel and express that emotion freely without shame or guilt or should. Because Jesus as both God who made emotions and man who embodied those emotions could relate to us like no one else. Surely he would understand our pain and hurt.

Not only does The Chosen writing team understand grief’s nuance, but also the awkward human experiences where seemingly paradoxical emotions coexist with grief like laughter and joy. Jesus and Andrew continue:

Andrew: Can we be laughing?

Jesus: Why not? You know, some of the moments in which we laugh the hardest come around the time of a funeral. Our hearts are so tender, all our emotions right at the surface. Laughter and tears, closer than ever.

If you have felt loss from the death of a family member, friend, or even a dream, you know how that grief can carry both moments of deep sadness in our throats with times of laughter from our bellies. It can be very confusing and even disorient us with feelings of shame and guilt. But, as Jesus’ character encourages Andrew, we must not resist our natural humanity in those most vulnerable moments.

We must lean into the emotions as they come. We must embrace our human feelings even in the most awkward and confusing of times. Because many times, the surprising joy and random laughter are an integral part of our healing grief journey. They keep us grounded, calm, and connected to the people and moments that matter.

This powerful moment between Jesus and Andrew lasts only a few minutes in Episode 2. But it sets the vibe for the rest of the episode but also the show. This is going to be an emotional ride and will carry the full range of human emotions we all experience and need to feel fully alive. The God-given emotions that show us who we are and in Who’s image we were made in.

These first two episodes have expanded my view of grief and human emotion and led me deeper into a love for the humanity of Jesus. Share what you’re experiencing so far with Season 4. Leave a comment or DM me, I’d love to hear your story.

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Whether you are a devoted Christian, nominally religious, or an avid Atheist, there is something for everyone in “The Chosen’s” brilliant storytelling and their accurate portrayals of emotional human experiences. The way the storytelling’s style and pace and the actors’ authentic portrayals allow for honest and moving emotional expression is a testament to Dallas Jenkins’ directing and the genius of his writing team.

[SPOILER ALERT: If you have not watched Season 4, Episode 1, this post contains major spoilers. Visit TheChosen.tv, sign in, and watch the show first.]

Especially the human emotion of grief. When my three daughters and I lost my wife, their mother, to cancer at the end of 2020, we entered our journey of grief. It is not for the faint of heart. It is messy and ugly, comes with ups and downs, twists and turns, ins, and outs, doubts and fears, and looks different for everyone. Walking through this mess can make you sensitive to the grief of others; especially when that grief is not portrayed well or worse, misunderstood and mishandled.

With the top Googled word of 2023 being “authentic,” it’s no surprise we’re all still longing for authenticity in our relationships and from the stories we give ourselves to. I always felt like movies and T.V. shows did a terrible job at handling grief: either the actors moved on too quickly with a few strategically timed tears or it was such an overacted response that felt forced and fake. A handful of shows have truly handled grief with care and attention and The Chosen is one of those.

With the highly anticipated release of Season Four this week, I knew from the past three seasons that episode one would not disappoint. And it did not. The Chosen has already covered grief from death, miscarriage, lost friendships, broken relationships, marriage strife, broken trust, rejection, failure, loss of job, leaving behind family and community, physical ailments and suffering, you name it. Episode 1 of Season 4 now had to handle the death and murder of a key character in the show, a close friend to Jesus’ disciples, and a vital person in the life of Jesus and his ministry: John the Baptist.

As Joanna, friend of the disciples and advocate for John the Baptist’s ministry and release from jail, delivered the tragic news of John’s death to his biggest proponent, Andrew, I waited to see how the show would handle the reaction. Right away, Andrew, played by brilliant and expressive actor Noah James, responds very naturally to the news: shock, denial, sadness, anger, resolve, overwhelm, strength and weakness, repeated over and over. Not just expressed on his face but in his voice and with his body. His eyes of shock, his arms waving with denial, his voice shaking and stuttering, tears flowing, and eventually his body losing strength forced to sit down on the ground unable to move. From experience feeling and seeing grief in real life, this is real grief.

As Jesus hears the news from the very priest who prayed over and blessed John at his circumcision 30+ years before, he collapses to the ground, weeping, tears his shirt sleeve, beats the ground, at a loss for words except to cry out, “oh, John!”.

When he makes it to the city to care for his disciples and share the news, his face is dirty and weary, ash wiped on his forehead for grief, speechless with a gentle look of love and sadness.

The look of each disciple captures the wide range of emotions and the diverse experience of grief: shock, sadness, confusion, fear, overwhelm, anger, loss, anger, depression, hopelessness, and exhaustion.

The honest grief drew me into the moment and the story with each character. Their face, their body language, their voices, their energy. It all felt very real. The way they acted individually and with the group felt so natural.

Taking the care, time, and attention to portray an honest grief not only makes for good storytelling and entertaining T.V., but for a transformative and communal viewing experience that creates value and change well beyond simply watching a show. It begins to change who we are and connects us deeper to what it means to be human.

And that brings us even closer to Jesus and the divine love He embodies.

I highly recommend this show and already Season Four is off to an intense and authentic start.

Listen to my two older daughters and I discuss The Chosen on our Chosen Fan Podcast (new episodes coming soon):

Watch The Chosen at https://watch.thechosen.tv/.